Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

What type of sex do women prefer, oral, anal, or vaginal?

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

My ex got into a relationship within 2 weeks after a breakup. What should I do?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I see through liars

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

What do you do when you are struggling to fall asleep?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Is it true that all men want a woman who looks like an Instagram “model”?

I can read

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Did Muhammad Ali ask Dundee to cut his gloves off before Eddie Futch stopped the fight in Thrilla in Manila?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Why do Indian parents force their kids to do stuff?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

How can I stop overthinking and take action more quickly?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

How do women feel when they are in love?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Is it true that people who are possessed by demons cannot see them until the demon is cast out? What is the reason for this?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I can count

I have a reading level above third grade

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand how hurricane paths work

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I actually pay taxes

I have an acute aversion to scumbags